There was a time that we could agree to disagree civilly. No drama, social media rants, diss tracks, no smearing of another’s career, family or reputation. Two people could have a disagreement and later on shake hands or even hug it out. Now, when it comes to matters of the heart like a breakup or divorce, family drama, work drama, a financial dispute or other serious things, I know that it is more complicated and emotional. I am talking about minor disagreements. If two people do not agree on something like a sports team, a sport, type of food, hair style and more, why are they going back and forth on social media and airing their private business for the entire world? No two human beings can agree on everything. It is impossible. We are all unique individuals and that is the beauty of the human race. Our differences make us a wonderful collection of unique masterpieces.
We have to do better. As adults, we set an example for children whether we want to do so or not. Children will naturally copy what we do not only what we say. We cannot say one thing and our actions contradict our words. If you have a disagreement with someone, try to work through any animosity privately. A text or social media rant is dangerous. It is easy to misinterpret what someone is trying to say when you are reading it. Agree to meet in person or do a phone call or video chat. Compromise is necessary but with limits. Under no circumstances should anyone be mistreated or disrespected. If you have a personal problem, it is unfair to take it out on everyone around you.
First, each of us needs to start with ourselves individually. We need to ask ourselves if we can be civil and be the bigger person when someone attempts to step on our toes or take us out of character. There is no one worth you losing your joy or peace. Secondly, if you need to confront someone (especially someone close to you like a family member, significant other, friend, church member or coworker), please do not use a group text or social media to dismantle the person and then wonder why your reputation is ruined. Handle your confrontation in private and if things are hostile, invite a mutually agreed third party. This third party needs to be someone who can keep all aspects of your conversation confidential.
Living a life of civility is needed and necessary. We are all different and no human being is 100% right. All of us are flawed and that is part of our beauty. We have to look outside of ourselves to learn more about the world around us. There is more than enough love available for us to be more understanding and merciful of one another.